Average Joe's Blog

You know – there are things in this life that you swear never to do again – never, never, never. Some of these vows are easily reached – like that time when, in an epileptic fit of blind rage, you picked the forest as your permanent abode, precisely because mum had forfeited your supper to her cattle that you had lost. Or that other year when you ruled that radio should become an eternal no-no, for its unredeemable sin of voting Dembo fourth on the ’94 charts. Number four! What abomination! Simple decisions, made on the spur of the moment; of course you knew you were lying to yourself. But there some precedents, whether made on the turn or after careful musing, that leave a permanent mark. Yea; they thought it was a joke when I just upped one day and realised that the slimy green leaf called okra sliding down my throat was just as bad for my masculine metabolism as a conscious gobsmacking gobbling of phlegm. It’s not that I’m allergic to okra. Hell, no. I just loathe it – there are...

Inspiration. That is the price you pay for being famous. Everybody invites you to a retinue of tedious ‘lectures’ where you are supposed to inspire your awestruck audience to greatness. Inspired to change your fortunes; like hell they say. Hell, I hate these gatherings, not especially because most of the time I am the subject of attention. Why can’t people just appreciate the fact that we are more than seven billion on this earth and that there is NO defined formula for ‘success’. That one man’s success could be another’s downfall? (Come on, man; you are supposed to inspire these kids; not depress them). I have no qualms, though, about today’s lecture; it’s kinda impromptu and I am in my home turf, flanked by my former favourite teacher (she is my friend now, and she asked me to give a word or two to her current demoralised class) and in my former favourite classroom – a perfect setting for an ambush speech. There is a maroon desk in the corner over there – the three ...

It is a given that Christmas time is a time to show goodwill; a time when we share our material possessions with just about everyone – friend or foe; even during these our times of great trepidation and uncertainty where things to share are between little and none, and the only thing one can be sure of is that which is already in one’s viscera. But, as they say, between true friends, even a shared gourd of water is good enough. Ten times out of ten during the past decade, the end of the year brought with it a lot of grief and consternation among our most impoverished and long suffering Zimbabwean ‘masses’, for it meant one more year added to the biblical seven of hunger; another interminable, tedious, hangover-less festive period spent with bottoms down under that mango, peach, musasa or munhondo tree that has suffered immature menopause due to a seemingly eternal drought. I am engaged in a hair-raising panga duel with the urge to laugh right now; and I am losing – so tough were th...

This means we will be getting the ball part of the blog's name. It has been always my passion to report on soccer issues, and I hpoe this is a stepping stone for better things to come . May the almighty help me as I embark on the journey into the unknown. Football News Headlines Provided Free by myfootballnews

Tolerant rent increases under the recently signed social contract are the only way to curb the rampant soaring of rents on commercial premises by property owners, a stakeholders indaba held to tackle issues concerning the Zimbabwe property sector in an effort to tame inflation declared recently. The indaba - organised by the department for Policy Implementation in the office of the President and Cabinet and held at the Rainbow Towers Hotel - also came up with a think tank to look into the issues raised by the property sector stakeholders present and map the way forward. At the no holds barred debate, there were accusations and counter accusations by tenants, who intimated that estate agents and landlords were fleecing them of their profits by charging exorbitant prices on a monthly basis, while the latter pointed to the prevailing hyper inflationary environment as an excuse. A particular sticking point was the accusation by tenants that they were being charged rent in foreign currency ...

Andrew Makari's right hand holds a long bolt, with which he is striking at a corroded brown object in his other hand. With time, one hears the clink of metal against metal – a sound that brings a smile to Makari’s weary face. “It’s steel,” he says, knowing that a kilogramme of the metal will fetch $350 from the scrape metal dealer only a stone throw away. Makari’s hope is not in vain for there is a lot of unpolished scrape metal lying around him – just as there are equally a lot of people with endless pieces of scrape metal surrounding them in the metal garbage lot near Olivine Industries in the Willowvale industrial area that has become their workplace. Dumping sites in Harare can be associated with many unpleasant thoughts – rotting paper, rotting food, and dumped babies. Rusted scrape metal – and the latter has become a source of income for many residents in areas surrounding the metal dumping ground. Steep ditches, reminiscent of those left by gold panners, now characterise th...

Jerry Davison Munozviziva here tateguru kuti kugeza kwava kunzi kuvhita Mirioni yave kunzi mita Nyama yave kunzi midheki? The above - controversial rapper Alicious 'Maskiri" Musimbe's lyrics - are just but a grain of sand on a beach of developments that have shaped the Zimbabwean social scene since the days of our forefathers. Gone is the drum beating way of communication that throbbed a quiet night, to be replaced by the telephone; only for the latter to give way to the cellular phone. It does not stop there. What Maskiri forgot to tell the ancestors was the latest e-volution in communication that has taken Zimbabwe's young by storm and given rise to a generation far removed from its elders. The internet. As recently as the year 2000, only 50 000 Zimbabweans were internet literate. But now, with 1,2 million surfers, Zimbabwe is the eighth best in Africa, according to the website, worldstats.com, and the number is still growing. South Africa tops the continent list ...